My friend is a nice person.
He is polite, always with good manners, opens the doors to me, answers my calls and text messages.
His clothing style is admirable, as he always looks like a male mannequin from the expensive clothing shop.
His hair does not have unpredictable ways of curling, or shaping into something that looks like the birds nest.
He is always perfectly shaved, and smells like a perfume store.
He does not drink beer from the bottle, like I do.
He does not swear.
In fact, I think I hate him.
I will blame this hate on his verbal tick, the only indignity he owns in his life.
How can such a guy repeat the “Hell Yeah” every two seconds no matter what the subject of the conversation is?
He blends the Hell Yeah perfectly in the conversation, even if we are talking about the newest information in the scientific field.
Although its admirable gift to make every sentence properly adjusted to fit the Hell Yeah in it, I hate it.
Once, I was counting how many times he can say it in one evening. I gave up, as I went crazy around one hundred times.
I implied to him how its inappropriate to abuse the Hell Yeah so much, and that I will surely kick him if he uses the phrase to excessively.
Of course, no chance of the Hell Yeah disappearance.
So, everyone in our friendship circle now call him the “Hell Yeah”, although Matthew is his real name.
He is not complaining.
Maybe the amount of the hair wax on his head absorbs the negative energy around him and makes him totally indifferent about his verbal tick flaw.
Hell yeah, I simply cannot be in his presence anymore!
I swear, the next time I’ll meet him, I will kick him!